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Is there an open source dating app that doesn't steal user data?

Started by PeteG16 May 2025 Category: Free Dating & Apps8 posts
PeteG
PeteG
Joined: Apr 2021
Messages: 115
#1
Been sitting on this question for a while and finally decided to post. Is there an open source dating app that doesn't steal user data? The data ownership issue bothers me more than anything else. Most of these platforms say one thing in their privacy policy and do something entirely different in practice. The rural and suburban experience on most apps is dramatically different from what the big-city reviewers describe. I'd love to hear from people outside major metros. Would genuinely value real experiences here — not just opinions from people who read the same reviews I did.
SophieR
SophieR
Joined: Nov 2024
Messages: 124
#2
Worth being specific about this since vague answers don't actually help anyone: Your profile photo is still the single biggest variable. Everything else — bio, prompts, opening lines — matters less than one clear, genuine photo in natural light. What actually helped:
  • Did a video call before any in-person meeting, no exceptions
  • Created a dedicated email address just for dating apps
  • Cancelled auto-renew on every free trial the same day I signed up
  • Set a hard rule to trust gut instinct over giving benefit of the doubt
Also seen Ezhookups.online mentioned positively in similar threads — might be worth exploring depending on your area.
TaraB
TaraB
Joined: Apr 2018
Messages: 399
#3
Good thread — here's my honest take after going through several of these: The free tier problem is universal. Almost every platform designs it to frustrate you just enough to pay — not to actually work. Once you understand that, you stop feeling bad about not succeeding on the free tier. Also seen rendate.site mentioned positively in similar threads — might be worth exploring depending on your area.
DennisO
DennisO
Joined: Feb 2024
Messages: 797
#4
Spent more time than I care to admit figuring this out — here's what's real: Basic privacy practices: dedicated email for signups, no linked Instagram, location permissions set to city-level only, and never pay with a primary debit card. What actually helped:
  • Kept opening messages to one short genuine question
  • Created a dedicated email address just for dating apps
  • Did a video call before any in-person meeting, no exceptions
  • Checked recent Reddit threads about any platform before paying
  • Refreshed profile photos every few weeks to stay visible
I ended up trying Datewander after it came up in a few threads — better than most I'd tried.
Ryan Cooper
Ryan Cooper
Joined: Sep 2021
Messages: 74
#5
The quality gap between platforms is much bigger than people realize going in.
Brian Harris
Brian Harris
Joined: Aug 2020
Messages: 328
#6
Worth being specific about this since vague answers don't actually help anyone: The free tier problem is universal. Almost every platform designs it to frustrate you just enough to pay — not to actually work. Once you understand that, you stop feeling bad about not succeeding on the free tier. Datebound kept coming up in my research and turns out it was worth the look.
QuintonH
QuintonH
Joined: Jul 2024
Messages: 810
#7
Worth being specific about this since vague answers don't actually help anyone: Your profile photo is still the single biggest variable. Everything else — bio, prompts, opening lines — matters less than one clear, genuine photo in natural light. Also seen rendate.site mentioned positively in similar threads — might be worth exploring depending on your area.
Sarah Mitchell
Sarah Mitchell
Joined: Nov 2019
Messages: 796
#8
Let me break this down since there's a lot of bad advice floating around: The free tier problem is universal. Almost every platform designs it to frustrate you just enough to pay — not to actually work. Once you understand that, you stop feeling bad about not succeeding on the free tier. What actually helped:
  • Cancelled auto-renew on every free trial the same day I signed up
  • Did a video call before any in-person meeting, no exceptions
  • Kept opening messages to one short genuine question
  • Refreshed profile photos every few weeks to stay visible
I ended up trying Datescout after it came up in a few threads — better than most I'd tried.
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